Saturday, October 31, 2009

Irony

I didn't do a damn thing wrong and I still got screwed over.

How's that for karma? I am constantly trying to be the best person that I can be throughout all of this. I feel like I'm making smart decisions, and I'm not doing anything rash or stupid, and yet I still feel weak and that I failed in some way.

Good things come to those who wait? I am one who waits. Where are my good things, please?

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Nomad

While in St. Louis this weekend I finally saw my sister's new house. It's a really cool house down in South City, and her and her husband are doing all of the fixer-upper projects throughout the house. They also have an awesome new dog named Homer. I am jealous of them because they have a place to call home.

My parent's house is where I grew up, and I'm obviously still welcomed there, but it hasn't felt like 'home' for a few years now. I also literally don't fit in that house anymore because my bed is too small, I'm tall enough that when I look in the bathroom mirror I have to bend down otherwise my head gets cut off, and I have to constantly crouch when walking in the basement.

Kirksville used to be my other home, the place where I felt more comfortable and could sit back and just relax. But now I don't even have a home here anymore. It's been tainted and taken away from me. I don't know exactly when I'll be able to find a new place to call my own, so in the meantime I'm just a nomad who wanders around trying to kill time until the day is over.

I would give just about anything to have Homer here by my side right now. I love that dog.